Dance Paventa was last seen being forcibly dragged into a precarious burrow by the hill trolls of the southern tier. This photograph is the last image captured of the boy, as the villainous trolls bore him to their cold, dark lair.
Some bards say that the Crabine will arise from their nests at Dunland and spread pestilence over the convents of this nation, condemning all our fair nuns to a vicious episode of chafing. Legend has it that the specter of Paventa, clad in only a golden blouse, will arise unbidden at the midnight hour in both the nightly quarters of these nuns, as well as the nightly gatherings of DJ's within the station walls, to bemoan the terrible fate of these virtuous women, bearing a Cornish game hen and a gilded candelabra in his hands. It is said that his corpse lies beneath the floor of Moe's Cabaret Lounge, and that his restless rustlings often produce frightening creaks from the rotted wooden boards. It is said that he returned in the Autumn of 2012, astride a Bucking Brown Stallion and bearing a flaming lute, the sound from which shall lay waste the surrounding lands and doom to infertility all the fine unwholesome women of our land. So button your britches and howl to the moon, to express your unremitting allegiance to the boy. Dance Paventa's program, The Tugboat Chronicles airs live every Friday this summer from 1-4pm.